Monday, January 25, 2010

Back To You

Wendell Slamo was a fourteen-year old kid who was just trying to live his life like any other teenager would. For the most part, he was well-liked by his peers as he did his part to revere everyone. Of course, there were some kids who loathed Wendell as he did have one flaw. You see, Wendell played baseball, basketball and soccor. He slept, breathed and ate sports. The thing was though, he was obsessed with winning. He would always put in his best effort to win every game he played. He took the game way too seriously. He would give an attitute to the people who were jocular, loquacious and he would even get frustrated with the neophytes. It's as if that when he was in the game, he wasn't himself. It was midway through the baseball season and the team was on a winning streak, so the problems were far from wanton. However, Jack was a new kid at the school and he was able to sign up beacause a previous player had broke his neck. The popular kids alienated him and they thought of him as a recluse. So, to see him at their game was a surprise. The game was intense. It was tied, there were two outs, bases were loaded and Wendell was up. He felt like he was the paragon and nothing would go wrong. He would be the hero everyone was talking about.
"Wendell, Jack's going to bat this time."
Wendell got into a fit. "Who is this punk who's trying to vilify me? It's my moment to shine."
"Don't be so selfish. The world doesn't revolve around you."
Wendell was letting his anger get the better of him. He suddenly became truculent. He somehow quelled himself as Jack did show some dexterity when he was up at bat. Maybe this "Jack" could pull it off he thought to himself. Three strikes later, Wendell exploded. He ran as fast as he could and shoved Jack into the ground and started punching him in the face nonstop. A blur later, Wendell was on his couch with his parents screaming at him at the top of their lungs. He just ignored everything and went to bed still upset at Jack with not even the slightest bit of guilt. Of course, he would regret it all tomorrow...
"Get up now!" is the sound he woke up to. It was 9:05 and apparently he didn't set his alarm clock. He looked his mom into the eye and said, "So, I can stay home right? For once."
His mom shook her head and laughed. "Oh, you're going to school whether you like it or not. There's no get out of jail free card here."
Within seven minutes, Wendell sprang out of the door and arrived at school at 9:30. He had to deal with the principal's harangue and detention. At lunch, his friends repudiated him. It was spaghetti for lunch and as he was about to sit down by himself, it spilled all over his clothes. He ran out to the bathroom, humiliated. The rest of the day wasn't any better. He forgot his homework at home, fell out of his chair in biology class and failed an algebra quiz. He came home and his mom had a smirk on her face and she asked how school was.
"Worst day of my life", he bluntly replied. His mom giggled. He didn't understand his homework, his iPod froze, his computer crashed and it was leftover meatloaf for dinner. He planned on taking a long, hot shower but there was no hot water.
Wendell became furious. "Why is all of this happening to me?"
"Why don't you ask Jack?"
"J-Jack?" His heart froze. He had somehow forgotten all about poor Jack who he shoved to the ground the day before. All the pain that poor kid must have felt when all he wanted to do was play some baseball. Wendell literally felt like the devil. He thought to himself, How could I do that to someone? How could I have been such a cruel, heartless monster?
"Mom, I really need to change my life around." She smiled. He went up to his room, made a card and grabbed his most prized possession: a baseball signed by Kevin Youkilis himself.
"Mom, can you drive me to the hospital?"
"I thought you'd never ask," and out the door they went. Wendell gave probably the world's most sincere and heartfelt apology anyone could think of. He wanted to change his life for the better. He gave Jack his baseball and told him the story of how he obtained it and told Jack that he wanted him to take his spot and told him to give it his all and not to let him emotions ever get the better of him. Amidst all of this, Wendell learned that you do learn from your mistakes and that if you do good deeds, you do get rewarded. You do bad deeds and well...


  1. 1.The main character is Wendell.
    2.The conflict is that Wendell has anger problems when he does sports and takes the games he plays to seriously.
    3. The climax is when Wendell punches Jack.
    4.The resolution was effective.
    5. The story did seem believable.
    6.The stories greatest strength was the setting.
    7. I don't think there is a short story element missing, great job.

  2. 1.The conflict in the story is that Wendell has to much anger when he plays sports and takes things to seriously. This conflict is internal. It is resolved when Wendell apoliges to the kid that he punched.
    2.Wendell changes overtime because at the end of the story he learns that he shouldn't take things to seriously.
    3.My favorite part of the story is the resolution because it was good." Amidst of all this Wendell ,learned that you do learn from your mistakes and that if you do good deeds,you do get rewarded."
    4.The story's theme is never take things to seriously or it can over take you.
    5.The story's best quality is the conclusion.
    6. your introduction could have some more detail.

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  4. 1. The conflict of the story was that Wendell takes sports too seriously and hits Jack when he fails to get a hit in a bnaseball game.
    2. Wendell changed a lot at the end because he realized that sports were not the most important thing and htta he should go and make an apology to Jack.
    3. I liked the conclusion because Wendell changed and instead of being a jerk he learns that their are more important things than just sports.
    4. The story's strongest quality was its theme. There really was a message behind this story.
    5. The story's theme is don't take any one thing really seriously or it can take over your whole life.
    6. I don't think there is much more you could add to your story. Great job.

  5. Note: Ignore my first comment. My 15 vocab words are revere, loathed, jocular, loquacious, neophytes, wanton, alienated, recluse, paragon, truculent, quelled, dexterity, repudiated, vilify, harangue.